#23 - The guitar guy, revisited

 The semi-pro guitarist reappeared on the dating website last week. He put up new pictures and indicated that he was looking for a relationship. I had not communicated with him in months, so I messaged him and we began an online conversation.  It was good to talk to him again.

            By the end of the week we decided to get together at his place for a sketching session. I brought my materials and drove the 50 kilometers required.   He texted me half a dozen times while en route, instructing me how to get there.

            When I arrived, he took my coat, welcomed me and offered me a glass of red Chianti. I accepted. We sat at opposite ends of his couch and began to talk about kids, hockey, his health, music, art and a variety of other topics. Eventually he stood up, offered me more wine and suggested that we begin sketching.

            I did several quick poses of him, standing and sitting. Then he did a quick sketch of me. I continued to draw him.  He had a flat screen TV on which aired a CNN broadcast of the Pistorius murder investigation. This is the case of the South-African double amputee Olympian accused of killing his girlfriend.  It paralleled the O.J. Simpson case in many ways. Already the judge had granted him bail.  We watched it, agreeing that it was a tragic event where a young lady’s life had been cut short in a horrific manner.

            We continued to talk, drink wine and sketch until midnight.  Eventually I suggested that I leave since it was a long drive home. He agreed, reached for my coat, walked me to the door and said “good night”. He hugged and thanked me for coming over.  The rest of the weekend I did not hear from him.  Sunday evening, while I was working on a new picture, I decided to text him.  He quickly responded that he was driving and could not chat.   I felt that I was being brushed off, that there was a disconnection on his part, like before, and because I cared about him, I let him go. 

Lesson #23 revisited - Some men on internet dating sites are emotionally paralyzed, not able to form an intimate connection with a woman. Luckily I did not do the hook-up. 

Life Lesson for the Gentleman - I think therapy is in order when you are this disconnected from your feelings.